I’m happily browsing Facebook when I come across a beautiful image shared by many friends of a woman carrying a smiling baby on her back, it’s a few beautiful words about nurturing your child by carrying them always in your heart and mind and how you soothe them by putting them to your breast. That’s it, the tears are rolling.
I want to share it, it’s how I feel about raising children, I wish everyone felt that way, but I can’t, it’s too hard, will Wriggles ever travel on my back to view the World? How can she when she coughs and blows out secretions that need clearing all the time? How can she if she can’t support her own head for long enough?
Then comes soothing at the breast, I wish so hard I could put her to the breast and make life better, but without sucking and swallowing, that can’t be.
It well and truly totally, utterly sucks.
I want to comment on my friends image to say it’s beautiful but I don’t want to upset them, I don’t want to put me in their heads and have them feel sad knowing how it must make me sad, so I don’t hit like and I don’t share.